r18novel Page 118
Page 118
The aura of a celebrity is dazzling and captivating, but it is also incredibly heavy.
The popularity brought by "Beyond the Stars" propelled Aoyama Nanami to unprecedented heights, and also made her feel pressure from all sides for the first time.
Every word she says and every expression she makes is magnified in interviews and programs, and then analyzed word by word by netizens.
"Aoyama Nanami seems a bit quiet, is she acting like a diva?"
“I agree. In the last interview, the host asked several questions, and she answered them very briefly, which felt a bit perfunctory.”
Nanami felt very wronged.
She's just not used to speaking in front of the camera, and she's naturally a bit slow to warm up and nervous, but she's been labeled as "aloof" and "acting like a big shot."
She began to be very careful, afraid that if she said something wrong, it would attract a new round of criticism.
What bothered her even more was the growing online criticism of her professional abilities.
As she became an internet sensation, some discordant voices began to emerge.
"To be honest, I'm getting a bit tired of it. Is Aoyama Nanami only good with ice queens?"
"Indeed, from Tsukuyomi to Isla, it feels like the same thing in a different bottle. Her voice is too one-dimensional; she simply can't handle other types of characters, can she?"
"It's purely luck that she landed two likable roles in a row. It's a typical case of 'one trick that makes you successful'. I bet she won't be popular for more than a year."
These sharp comments made Nanami feel somewhat uncomfortable.
She tried to tell herself not to care, that those people were just jealous.
But when the night is quiet, she still can't help but read those comments over and over again, and then fall into deep self-doubt.
Are they... right?
Am I really only capable of voicing one type of character?
Is my success really just due to good luck?
No! It's not!
A spirit of never giving up welled up from the bottom of my heart.
She wants to prove to everyone that Aoyama Nanami is definitely not some "one-trick pony" "pretty face voice actress"!
She went directly to her agent, Ms. Yamamoto.
"Ms. Yamamoto! I'd like to try out some different types of roles! Could you please keep an eye out for audition opportunities for... lively and cheerful characters, or carefree characters, or even villainous roles!"
Miss Yamamoto looked at her with a troubled expression.
“Nanami, I know you want to break through your limitations. But... your current image and popularity are deeply tied to a character like 'Isla.' It's very risky to rashly try a role that's too different from your own. If you mess it up, it will have a huge impact on your reputation.”
“But I don’t want to be typecast!” Nanami said stubbornly. “If I stay in my comfort zone, I’ll never improve!”
In the end, Ms. Yamamoto couldn't refuse her and agreed to keep an eye out for her.
Soon, the opportunity came.
A campus romance comedy needs a lively and energetic second female lead who's like a little sun all day long.
Nanami received the audition script and practiced day and night for several days.
She watched similar anime repeatedly, imitating the tone and laughter of those energetic girls, and felt that she was very well prepared.
However, at the audition, when she read her lines in her sweet and lively voice, which she had practiced countless times, the sound supervisor frowned.
“Miss Aoyama, your voice… sounds a bit forced.”
"It feels like you're 'playing' a lively girl, rather than you 'actually' being a lively girl. There's no soul in your voice."
The next few attempts all yielded similar results.
The more she tried to portray the character's "vitality," the more artificial and stiff her voice sounded.
Ultimately, she was eliminated without any surprise.
This failure completely dampened her enthusiasm.
Then, the second time, the third time...
She plays a tomboyish, carefree, athletic girl.
She's a dark and scheming villain, and she sounds like she's reciting a textbook.
A series of failed auditions completely shattered Nanami's confidence.
She began to fear entering the recording studio, afraid of seeing the disappointed look in the sound supervisor's eyes.
She realized that she seemed to be truly trapped.
That cage called "Ice Queen" was built by her own hands, but now she can't find the way out.
She was plunged into unprecedented confusion and predicament.
Her agency also noticed her problem.
Ms. Yamamoto spoke with her several times, her words filled with worry.
"Nanami, how about we take it easy for now? Take on some roles that match your voice and solidify your popularity. We can discuss the transition later."
Nanami remained silent and did not answer.
She knew her agent meant well, but she was still resentful.
Is this all there is to my voice acting career?
Am I destined to never become a truly talented voice actor like Hanazawa-senpai, capable of handling any role?
The intense longing and the powerless reality tormented her, causing her immense pain.
Fortunately, the setbacks she had experienced before prevented her from continuing to deplete herself like this. After struggling in the quagmire of confusion and self-doubt for a few days, Nanami began to deeply reflect on her previous behavior and thoughts.
It feels like you're 'playing a role'.
After calming down, recalling what the sound supervisor had said to her during the audition, she seemed to understand where she had gone wrong.
Her previous so-called transformation and breakthroughs were just superficial imitations.
She wanted to portray an energetic young girl, so she learned how others laughed and spoke in a cute tone.
She wanted to voice a villain, so she learned from others how to lower their voices and how to give a sinister laugh.
She was like a mediocre actor who only learned the superficial aspects of a role but never explored its essence and soul.
She was "playing" rather than "understanding".
After figuring it out, Nanami naturally knew what to do.
Besides biographical sketches, she began studying stage play scripts, analyzing the inner struggles of each character in different situations.
They might even look up some professional psychology books.
The process was tedious, but Nanami enjoyed it.
She could clearly feel that a profound transformation was taking place within her.
Her understanding of "performance" was completely overturned, and then rebuilt.
……
A week later, Ms. Yamamoto gave her another audition opportunity.
It's a late-night radio drama, featuring a minor character with only a few lines.
The character is a middle-aged convenience store clerk who feels numb and weary of everything due to the pressures of life.
This is a role that has absolutely nothing to do with Nanami's own image, age, or voice, and almost everyone thought she had no chance of being chosen.
Ms. Yamamoto only told her about this opportunity with the idea of "letting her go out and clear her head".
But Nanami agreed without hesitation.
On the day of the audition, she did not do any so-called "role-playing".
She simply constructed the character's past in her mind.
A weary soul, repeating the same work every day, seeing no hope, its edges worn smooth by life.
When she walked up to the microphone and said "Welcome," her voice was soft, even a little hoarse, carrying a weariness and indifference that came from the depths of her being.
That wasn't a young girl deliberately lowering her voice to imitate a middle-aged person; it was a real, living convenience store clerk who had lost enthusiasm for life, unconsciously uttering a catchphrase during the monotonous routine of her daily work.
The sound supervisor and producer both looked up from behind the mixing console, staring at her with incredulous expressions.
They heard a complete story from that simple line.
The result is no doubt.
Nanami got the role.
When Ms. Yamamoto learned of this news, she was so surprised that she couldn't close her mouth for a long time.
She looked at Nanami, her eyes filled with confusion and surprise.
She couldn't understand what had happened to this girl in just one week.
It was as if her Ren and Du meridians had suddenly been opened.
Nanami simply smiled, silently thanking herself for not giving up.
……
Just as she was focusing on improving her skills, Ms. Yamamoto from her agency approached her again with a brand new project proposal.
"Nanami." Ms. Yamamoto pushed the proposal in front of her, took a deep breath, and said, "After careful discussion, the company's senior management has formulated a completely new development direction for you."
"Based on your current popularity and the amazing potential you have just demonstrated... the company has decided to officially launch the 'Aoyama Nanami Idolization' project!"
"Idolization...project?"
Aoyama Nanami stared at the beautifully printed proposal in front of her, her mind blank for a moment.
The cover of the project proposal features a promotional photo of her taken for "Beyond the Stars". In the photo, she has a cool gaze and a good temperament, and she does have the air of an "idol".
“That’s right.” Ms. Yamamoto’s voice was filled with barely suppressed excitement. “Nanami, this is the company’s highest recognition for you! Look here…”
She opened the proposal, pointed to its contents, and began to explain it in detail.
"The first step is to release your solo single! We've already contacted top music producers in the industry to create a hit song tailor-made for you, guaranteeing an instant success!"
"The second step is to hold a solo concert and fan meeting! The venue has been booked, in Shibuya!"
"There will also be a personal photobook, an exclusive radio program, and a guest appearance on variety shows on mainstream TV stations... The company will invest all its resources to package you and make you the top idol voice actress of the new generation!"
Ms. Yamamoto's vision was dazzling and incredibly alluring.
That was a shortcut to fame, wealth, and a wider world.
Any new voice actor would probably be overjoyed without hesitation when faced with such an opportunity.
But Nanami felt an unprecedented sense of entanglement and resistance.
In her mind, she didn't picture herself singing and dancing on stage, radiating brilliance.
Rather, it was the pure, indescribable joy she experienced when she completely immersed herself in the world of the character.
She aspires to be an actress who shapes souls with her voice.
Instead of idols who sell their persona and smiles under the spotlight.
“Ms. Yamamoto…” Nanami hesitated before speaking, “I… I’m just a voice actress. I can’t sing or dance at all…”
“You can learn if you don’t know how!” Ms. Yamamoto said immediately. “The company will hire the best vocal and dance teachers for you! Nanami, you have to understand that the voice acting industry is not what it used to be.”
"Simply knowing how to do voice acting will only narrow your career path. Becoming an idol is the best way to maximize your commercial value and extend your career!"
"But……"
"No buts, Nanami!" Ms. Yamamoto's tone became somewhat earnest. "I know you love voice acting, and the company hasn't asked you to give it up! The two don't conflict at all!"
"Think about it, once you become a top idol and your popularity soars, won't you be able to get more and better roles? It's a win-win situation!"
The agent's words sounded impeccable, full of "correct" business logic.
Nanami was speechless, but her inner struggle only intensified.
She knew that what Ms. Yamamoto said was true and that she meant well.
But deep down, a voice stubbornly told her that this was not what she wanted.