What's wrong with Superman's son wanting to be Superman?

Page 481

It's roughly after Ian disappeared during his last return to the DC Universe. Thor and Captain America were captured by the Time Bureau. She met Doctor Strange, and the two of them came together to rescue Thor and Captain America. Then they encountered Ultron, fought, and finally had to destroy part of TVA to escape.

"Anyway, we worked really hard, and this is how it turned out." Morgan Stark winked at Ian, essentially giving Ian a recap of events that Ian was unaware of.

Very skilled.

Ian was stunned for a moment, then, after processing the information, he keenly grasped one point: "Wait, you said you and Doctor Strange? What about Gwen? Shouldn't she be with you?"

He remembered that Gwen had previously acted with Morgan.

"Miss Gwen?" Morgan was taken aback, her face instantly changing color. "Yes...right! And Miss Gwen too!"

She looked around frantically, searching frantically, but all she could see was endless garbage and ruins; there was no sign of Gwen Stacy anywhere.

"Could she... she still be inside the Time Bureau... because of my... because of the explosion I just caused..." Morgan's eyes instantly filled with panic.

Her face turned deathly pale.

Although she had seen the world with her father and godfather, and may have even fought in places like the zombie universe, the shock of personally killing a comrade was still too great for her.

"I...I killed someone?!"

Morgan rolled his eyes, feeling as if he was about to faint, and his voice was filled with fear.

"Look over here! Look over here!" Just as the little girl was about to have an emotional breakdown, Deadpool, who was hanging upside down, started his performance again, forcibly drawing everyone's attention to her.

He talked on and on to Ian.

"Hey! Hey! The Avengers' treasurer! The man who stepped out of a comic book, right? I know you! I also know what that look you gave me just now meant! Don't deny it! As long as you agree to let me join the Avengers and sign your name, I'll give you a few bends! How about it? Isn't this a good deal?"

Completely disregarding his disheveled state of being hung upside down, he continued talking to himself: "If I hadn't overheard my wife's daughter, who's 28 days pregnant, hoping her dad would join the Avengers and be a real hero, you'd never be able to team up with Deadpool in this lifetime! You should be secretly happy!"

Deadpool kept talking.

Ian was immediately enraged by Deadpool's bizarre remarks!

"Damn Marvel Nantong! Just because he's a 'big shot' he dares to talk to Master Ian like that? Doesn't he know that 'Master' is someone above 'big shot'?"

He has never liked to communicate too much with mental patients because he has always felt that mental illness may be contagious, so he spoke directly to Doctor Strange next to him.

"Doctor, think of a way to sew this guy's mouth shut! It's too noisy!" The mouth is the primary source of infectious diseases, and Ian's approach is correct.

Doctor Strange hesitated.

He had just been brutally beaten by the other party, and who knows what other sneak attack methods the other party might be hiding—after all, as a mage, he was very fragile.

Thor was braver. He had long disliked Deadpool and was determined to avenge Odin, who he didn't know if his innocence had been "tainted" under the guise of breastfeeding.

"Let me handle this! I've had my eye on this guy for ages!" Thor carefully handed baby Odin to Captain America, who looked speechless, and strode forward, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.

Some people volunteered.

Ian immediately nodded his large head.

"These Nan Tongs need to be dealt with severely. Don't let me, Master Ian, be traumatized by these perverts before I've even reached the age where my little head controls my big head!"

Ian glared fiercely at his evil god eyes.

"Don't come any closer!"

Upon seeing this, Deadpool immediately began to struggle.

He tried to touch the Infinity Gauntlets on his belt, but soon discovered that the spare Infinity Gauntlets that were originally hanging on his belt had been taken away by the group of "bad bastards" below at some point!

"Ugh! You bunch of robbers! Thieves! Give me back my Infinity Gauntlet! I bought it with my own money!"

Deadpool protested.

The protest was ineffective.

A scalpel is still a knife, and Thor, the god of cooking, is sharpening it. Thor presses closer, his face burning with the fury of revenge for his father and a hint of satisfaction at finally being able to vent his anger. The metal scalpel in his hand, the huge, rusty sewing needle, and the thick fishing line all gleam ominously in the eerie light of the end of time.

"You think Deadpool is someone who's easily scared? You think I'm afraid of you? Go eat your shit!"

Deadpool, hanging upside down, rolled his eyes.

Plop plop plop—! ! !

Then, a series of extremely abrupt, long, and even somewhat eerie fart sounds suddenly burst from Deadpool's buttocks, which were covered by a bodysuit!

The sound was loud and lingering, sounding particularly jarring in the relatively quiet air above the garbage dump.

Everyone was taken aback by this sudden "lifelike attack," and subconsciously took a half step back. Even Thor subconsciously pinched his nose and paused for a moment.

It really stinks.

Taking advantage of this brief moment, Deadpool even tried to "apologize" in a rap-like tone.

"Yo~ Sorry~ Brother~ You know~ when I breathe~ I don't like to exhale~ so I choose to store a bunch of carbon dioxide and then fart like crazy~"

The rapping provocation made Thor, who was already emotionally unstable, very angry.

Thor's face instantly turned from red to green, and then from green to black!

When has the Thunder God of Asgard, the guardian of the Nine Realms, ever been subjected to such vile and filthy provocation?! This is even more humiliating than being slashed by Surtur!

I'm going to sew your mouth shut so you can't utter a single word!

Thor roared.

The power of thunder surged uncontrollably across his body.

Seeing this, Deadpool, though his mouth was about to be attacked, still had his sassy instincts override everything, "No! Don't do this! Bro! Calm down! If you let my mouth go, I'll... I'll cut off the husk of my 'corn cob' and make you leather shoes! All-natural! Breathable and sweat-absorbent! Guaranteed to be more comfortable than Frigga's woven shoes!"

"Don't mention my mother! And what corn husk?" Thor paused, his face showing surprise and confusion, clearly not understanding the Earthly slang.

But Ian, who was standing nearby, understood!

Ian's initial "minor anger" instantly escalated into "major rage," like a fire doused with gasoline!

"Bastard thing!"

Ian was so angry he almost jumped up. "You dare to show off at a time like this?! 'Cornmeal corn'?! You dare to flaunt something that's just a Coca-Cola bottle? Wait until I grow up..."

Before he could finish speaking, Deadpool, as if finding a new way to court disaster, immediately retorted, "I don't believe it! How could anyone in this world have 'capital' as big as a corn cob! Bragging is tax-free! I, Deadpool, am the industry benchmark! A Coca-Cola bottle is already a gift! Unless you..."

Deadpool's words were interrupted by Ian throwing a rock.

"Sew his swallow skin back on too! Yes! Sew it on! Quickly! Nobody knows Deadpool better than me! I firmly believe that even with just the swallow skin, he could say even more disgusting things than he is now!"

Ian urged Thor to hurry up.

Although Thor didn't quite understand the profound philosophical and technical issues of "swallows talking," he pretended to understand... no, he fully trusted the judgment of the creature!

"I understand!"

Thor nodded with a serious expression.

Doctor Strange then cleverly applied this knowledge to other situations.

"From the perspective of anatomy and mutant physiology, theoretically, under certain extreme mutations, the sphincter at the end of the urinary system can be remodeled and have the function of mimicking vocal cord vibration."

He is a genuine medical doctor, and even if he talks nonsense, he is still an authority in the New Justice League, since none of the people present, including the leader of the New Justice League, have gone to university.

"Doctor, you're absolutely right! This guy could have a spare mouth hidden all over his body, it's impossible to guard against!" Ian nodded in deep agreement, he had become the villain he hated most.

"What! This isn't the Avengers I know! You can't all be given scripts that are even more insane than mine!"

When Deadpool heard that his head was in danger, he finally broke down. He had always known that he was mentally ill, but he did not expect that these people were all just as ill as he was!

Avengers!

Where is your integrity?

How could such a bizarre yet seemingly scientifically sound solution be discussed so seriously?

"Damn it! No! This is what heroes are like after their hearts have been stolen! Homelander's team is friendlier than you guys!" Deadpool started writhing wildly.

He looked anxiously at Thor, who was closing in.

"We're all Avengers! Give me a chance! Leave me an opening! In case... in case you become infertile... I can help you... Ughhhh!!!"

Before he could finish speaking, Thor had already inserted the needle without hesitation! The technique was precise, the stitches were dense, and it was full of the "ingenuity" of Asgardian craftsmen.

Thor, having been a cook before, was quite skilled with his hands. In no time, he expertly sewed Deadpool's incessantly chattering mouth shut!

The world was finally completely quiet. Only Deadpool's desperate, muffled sobs remained. His sewn-on mouth emitted rapid "mmm" sounds.

His eyes revealed genuine panic.

Because Thor is preparing to stitch up other parts.

"stop!"

It was Sylvie who couldn't stand it any longer. She covered her head and stopped this group of people, who were even more perverted than the villains she had ever seen, from carrying out their inhumane human modifications on Deadpool.

Seeing that Deadpool could no longer speak, Ian did not insist. After all, he was not a real psychopath; he just didn't want Deadpool to say those filthy things to him.

Let's talk about Gwen again.

Ian's gaze shifted to little Morgan, who was still in a daze and filled with self-blame. The girl was pale and had empty eyes, clearly still reeling from the shock of "I might have blown up Gwen."

"Think back carefully, what happened to Gwen after the explosion? Is her head still intact?" It's just that Baal hasn't been taken out for a stroll by Ian recently, otherwise Baal would definitely know how Ian wanted to show his reluctance to part with his friend—by keeping him by Ian's side just like him.

"I think...I think..."

Ian's words seemed to reopen Morgan's wounds, and her expression grew increasingly blank, her lips trembled, and she looked on the verge of a complete breakdown and crying.

Sylvie, who was standing nearby, sighed and answered for Morgan.

"Given the scale and nature of the explosion, Gwen Stacy's body, located in the epicenter, is probably completely obliterated. My condolences."

Her tone was calm, as if she had witnessed countless partings and deaths throughout the timeline. However, Ian did not show any sadness or anger upon hearing this.

He closed his eyes, seemingly sensing something. As the master of the mutation, Ian's perception of his "familiars" had become exceptionally acute.

At least Gwen didn't die a violent death.

A moment later, Ian opened his eyes, and his mouth twitched slightly as he tried to make a "crooked-mouthed dragon king" smile, though the effect was somewhat terrifying.

“Don’t panic.” Ian said with a mysterious confidence. He stood up, patted Morgan on the shoulder, and began to boast: “Uncle Ian, I’ve already gained some influence in the universe! Once I retrieve Gwen’s soul, I’ll personally create a brand new, top-of-the-line body for her!”

"The skeleton is made of the hardest adamantium and uru metal! The surface is covered with titanium alloy! The pectoral muscles are forged from gold! Guaranteed to be impervious to blades and bullets, with maximum physical and magical resistance!"

"And also, set some diamonds where they're supposed to be! How about that? Isn't it amazing?" Ian thought he was a genius, and he was giving Gwen the maximum emotional value.

Unfortunately, few people can directly understand his "gentleness".

Everyone: "…………"